Author – Sindhura Saradhi
The present generation of young people, boasting to be the most advanced human beings with a high-level of thought process, are failing to understand the importance of marriage. No wonder, they are finding rituals and traditions funny and boring. This attitude of theirs seems to arise from hyper-addiction to social media and the internet. People, living in a virtual world with no customs, rituals or other restrictions on a proper lifestyle, are those who can’t make real friends, can’t be involved with real people and understand real life!
In today’s generation, people who are not ready to take up the responsibility of valuing familial relationships in life, are the ones who make fun of marriage, its traditions and customs.
I can strongly say that anybody in this world would need guts to enter a relationship called ‘Marriage’. Marriage is not a bed of roses; it is a blend of several emotions that any person doesn’t even know existed, prior to getting married. Marriage is a process of falling in love once again when the couple meet each other on the day of the wedding, and then again and again, each day for the rest of their lives. Marriage is no fun, and getting married is not either.
Marriage is not just for two people, but two families, a bunch of relatives, and all those who want to see the couple happy with their relationship. Relatives and friends do not attend a wedding to please someone, boast about their properties and jewellery or have good food; instead, they arrive to bless the couple.
We need to remember that each blessing counts. This is no superstition. It is pure science. When a gathering of people radiate high levels of positive energy in a wedding through positive thoughts, happy faces, and pure blessings, it creates a great level of positivity in the newly formed relationship. The simple logic here is that a smile is contagious, and so is happiness. That is why, we always see cheerful environment with smiling faces everywhere in the weddings. In real sense, we don’t see a crying couple or a sulking attendee in a wedding.
Women in their best attire, men in their best behaviour, and the couple looking more beautiful than usual – all these happen in real world, and not in virtual world. In real world, people understand that such gatherings do result in a refreshed mind; since there is no better anti-depressant than being happy and meeting with people we really love. Gatherings such as weddings, birthday parties or any other social get-togethers happen for a reason. Good food is just another part of such occasions, which can only lift the mood.
On the other hand, in case of south Indian marriages, all that glitters is absolutely gold. Here, the guests are received with great respect. To be more specific, the food that is served in the wedding is a symbol of utmost respect towards the guests who attend the ceremony to shower pure love and blessings to the new couple. This is why the bride’s father, who hosts the wedding, ensures that no guest leaves with an empty stomach. There seems to be nothing funny in trying to be a good host!
Besides, our traditions clearly state that a daughter is nothing less than a son; hence, she has every right to take a part of the family’s property. The bride’s father wholeheartedly washes the feet of his son-in-law with holy water while giving away his daughter, along with some amount of money to start their new life. This is not funny either!
This custom may have been misused by some money-minded people, but the fact that it indicates a father’s responsibility towards his daughter’s new life cannot be denied. Showering the bride’s new family with gifts, and the bride with gold and saris, or anything that makes her happy is a way of telling her that a father is never an outsider. He will always be there for her even if she gets married and enters a new family.
Nothing is funny or boring in these traditions. Each of these customs has been designed like a set of diamonds in a beautiful necklace. Even if one diamond is missing, the necklace will lose its attraction. This is what happens when we fail to respect any single tradition or custom in the Indian marriage. After all, getting married is not tying the knot with one person; it needs two families with mutual love, respect and acceptance.
Marriage is not fun, and love is not either. Be it arranged or a love marriage, if we do not find any value in our country’s traditions, there is no way we can respect ourselves!